Getting over heartbreak | Live your best life
- Carly Morton
- Apr 6, 2019
- 3 min read
Updated: Apr 17, 2019
Heartbreak means many different things to each individual. For some, the death of a pet could cause serious heartbreak, while for others, it may be only reserved for experiences such as being fired, going through a break up or losing a loved one. Sometimes we can become insensitive and determine that some 'heartbreaks' are 'more' or 'less' than others, but unless we are the ones experiencing it, it's not up to us to determine how it might be effecting someone.
My point here is, that I'm not going to talk about a specific type of heartbreak but I'm hoping that some of these strategies will be useful no matter what the situation.
First things first...let the feels flow.
In an unfortunate situation we can often shut out our emotions as a coping mechanism. Try to put it in the back of our minds. Forget about it. It's not really helping...
Sure, feeling sad, angry, vengeful, bitter broken or hopeless REALLY sucks. But you are going to have to feel those things at some point so you may as well get them out of the way. Cry about it. Yell and scream. Write down every thought and feeling that is going on in your head. Do anything! (well, within reason) but whatever you do, don't do nothing. Letting yourself feel these things and feel them with abandon and free from shame is an important step in the healing journey.
Lean on those who love you.
If your a perfectionist, like me, telling people your woes and exposing the vulnerable person behind the often well put together façade is a very daunting experience and one that you may vehemently shy away from.
I guarantee that none of your family, friends or co-workers will judge or somehow think less of you for going through a tough time. While they may not have the best advice at all times, sometimes just their presence can be a source of comfort, particularly if being alone at this point in time is really tough for you.
What these people may also be able to do is help you get a new lease on life.
When experiencing big changes we must learn to adapt because sometimes things can't go back to the way they were before...especially if you are now searching for a new job or single after years of being in a relationship.
Clearly there are some heartbreaks where it's pretty impossible to look on the bright side. Death being a clear example of this. However, it IS possible to try and seek positives in being made redundant, dumped or having a friendship break down. Try to look at this as an OPORTUNITY TO CREATE A BETTER LIFE.
While it's sad that a part of your life is coming to an end and you are probably fearful or uncertain about how your life is going to look now that things have changed. But the beauty of things is, it can look however you want it to.
Perhaps this is your time to seek out a better paying job, one with better hours or one that you are more interested in?
Perhaps this is your opportunity to work on loving yourself and down the track finding someone who treats you the way you deserve?
Perhaps this is your opportunity to build quality friendships with people who have similar vales, beliefs and lifestyles...people who inspire you to be a better version of yourself?
Things have changed.
Now that you have let it out and surrounded yourself with people who love and support you no matter what, it's time to live your best life. Experiencing death and other forms of heartbreak really puts in perspective the fragility of our own existence. Start writing down your goals, priorities and dreams. Create a vision board and have something positive to motivate you. Remember that #YOLO and that while we will always experience heartbreak in one form or another, it doesn't have to stop us from living our best life and enjoying ourselves while we are here.
For more on mental health and positivity, check out my YouTube channel Carly Morton.
Carly xx
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